Food for thought – Page 28 – N A Waterman Talks About…

Misery Loves Company…

Published on April 26, 2015April 26, 2015 by NAWatermanLeave a comment

So today I’ve decided to write about something that has been on my mind for quite some time. You ever had or have a family member for whatever reason unknown to you…despises you and wants everyone in the family to despise you as well?

I think the real sad part is when that family member is someone that you were once close to and have spent a lot of your time helping no matter what it was they asked for. It is definitely a hurtful situation. It’s one thing for that person to have hate for you, but it’s quite another when they make it their mission to make sure other family members feel the same way about you. “Misery Loves Company” is such a true statement and unfortunately because people love gossip and loves to hear the worst about people… they tend to believe whatever that “miserable” person says about you. Why is it that people, especially your own family members want to believe the worst in you? Why is it that instead of having your back, they join what I like to call “the dark side”? Why does that person have such hate for you and want others to feel that way about you as well? These were just a few questions that has been swirling through my mind for a long time.

I had to really think about it because I know that I am a good person. I mean, I’m not perfect… none of us are, but I have always strived to be the best person I could be. I am a true believer that if you do bad things, bad things come your way and it’s ten times worse than what you did.

So after careful thought and a lot of analyzing, this is what I believe…

I believe that person is not happy with themselves. When you start to accomplish great things and they don’t… jealousy develops. And instead of turning that jealousy into motivation, that jealousy turns into hate. Hate is such an ugly demon and it wears a disguise called “sympathy”.

Instead of using that talented mind to better their lives, they use their mind to spew hate. And we all know that people love to root for the “underdog”. So when one person becomes successful in what they do and the other person does not, people tend to be more sympathetic to the less accomplished person. Why do people that tend to do well always get the short end of the stick? I personally do not believe that one person is better than another. I believe we all have an opportunity to be successful. We choose the path in life we want to take and sometimes it’s the wrong path. Not everything in life is easy. As some point, we need to put on our big girl or big boy underwear and grow up. It’s so much easier to place blame on others for your misfortune instead of taking responsibility for your life. You cannot keep blaming people, especially that someone that has been there for you to only help you better your life. It might make you feel some type of self-gratification by turning people against that person, but believe me that is only temporary. “You can’t make yourself happy bringing misery to other people”.

So as this “miserable” person has hate for me, I will always have love for that person. Family is so important to me. It bothered me so much that some family members joined the misery train and shunned me. I guess it still bothers me and that is why I am writing this blog, but I refuse to create my own misery train. I am loving the train I’m on right now.

So my advice to any family member that shuns another because of what you heard from another family member without factual proof, I really want to say shame on you… oops I just did. Seriously, I say you should be there for that “miserable” person, they obviously need all the love they can get. I just ask that you be there for the right reasons. Misery knows how to pull at your heart strings. The next time a family member says something negative about another family member, think about their motives before you get sucked into their web of lies. Remember…” Misery Loves Company!!!”

As always, thanks for reading. Have a beautiful day and I will talk to you soon 💋

You are Beautiful…Part 9

Published on April 18, 2015April 18, 2015 by NAWatermanLeave a comment

So as much as we talk about having confidence and that you should look in the mirror everyday, we cannot forget that the most important aspect of beauty is “inner beauty”. You don’t want to become too self-absorbed. That confidence turns into arrogance. Confidence is beautiful, Arrogance is ugly…

How can you tell the difference between confidence and arrogance? People tend to mistake the two. Anytime you see someone taking pride in themselves, you immediately label them arrogant before they even open their mouths.

Four Major Differences Between Confidence and Arrogance

Confident people always look beyond the outer beauty of others. They place more value on a person’s beautiful soul and make you feel as though you’re the most beautiful person in the room. Arrogant people really could care less about your inner beauty. Honestly they could care less about your outer beauty, because they believe no one is better than they are.
Confident people don’t brag about how beautiful they are. I know some might say that we always tell people to look in the mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are. That’s fine, but there is a big difference between telling yourself you’re beautiful and walking around telling everyone that would listen how beautiful you are. Arrogant people on the other hand will constantly brag about everything that is beautiful about them. I call that “confidence overload“. They never wait for you to compliment them on anything. If you do get the opportunity to squeeze in a compliment, they are never humble about it. They’re just wondering why it took you so long to say it.
Confident people sees the flaws in themselves and embraces the beauty of it. Arrogant people… well they don’t have any flaws. Remember, they are perfect. Haha
Confident people love to compliment others on their uniqueness. They try to encourage you to see the beauty you have. It doesn’t take away anything from them to give someone else a compliment. You ever had a person who would always try to “one up you” on everything? Instead of allowing your beauty to shine on whatever it was you were complimented on, they either tried to find some negative to knock you down a notch or they just simply made it known that it was not a big deal because whatever that compliment you were given was, they could definitely top that? That is a classic trait of an arrogant person.

The bottom line is that there is a thin line between beauty and ugly. As I mentioned earlier, you can by society standards physically be one of the most beautiful people. However if your mind, heart and soul does not match… l hate to tell you this, but you are essentially an ugly person.

Building confidence can take some work. But once that confidence kicks in, it becomes that much easier to move onto the next level of arrogance. It’s much more difficult to be a beautiful person, then it is to be an ugly person. I still say look in that mirror everyday and tell yourself you are beautiful. Just don’t be delusional and think you’re the most beautiful person ever created. I mean really…

On a serious note, as I always end my blog… the message is that You are beautiful, we are all beautiful. Humble yourself. It is more than ok to tell someone else they are beautiful. Remember what the quote says:

“Beauty isn’t about having a pretty face, it’s about having a pretty mind, a pretty heart and a pretty soul.”

You are Beautiful…Part 8

Published on April 15, 2015April 15, 2015 by NAWatermanLeave a comment

Celebrate the things you like about your body. Why must we always knock ourselves down about the things we do not like about our body? We always talk about people making us feel insecure about our body image, when in reality, we do it to ourselves more than others do it to us.

I have been guilty of it. We all have at one point in our lives and you know what… it is exhausting to always complain about the things we don’t like. Isn’t it much more exciting and less stressful to talk about the things we love about our body? I have a petite body frame, but am very curvy. Within the last few years I have been suffering with major fibroid and endometriosis issues (which I will talk about in my “Who Am I” page coming soon). I mention my medical issues to say that ever since I was a teen I have always had a flat stomach and because of my issues, my stomach is no longer as flat as it once was. Oh man, when those fibroids and endometriosis gets aggravated and become inflamed, forget it…I look like I have a little bun in the oven. Now I am one of those girls who loves to wear clothes that shows off my curves. I believe “if you got it, flaunt it”… in a tasteful way of course.

I would exercise extra hard to get my stomach flat again, not realizing I was just making my issues on the inside of my body worst. People would tell me that my stomach does not look as bad as I am picturing it to be. That it is all in my head. So I have finally came to the realization that my health is more important. That it is all in my head. Don’t get me wrong, I do still have my moments when I am complaining about my so-called big stomach. I am a work in progress. Forgive me…I am only human. But I will say that when I complain, I have a quick come back. I’ll say “OMG look at my big ole stomach, but I’m still sexy”… haha. So I have learned to embrace all that is beautiful about my body and not make what I think to be a flaw the major focus.